Welsh Humor

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Comment by gaabi on August 21, 2008 at 7:25pm

Mrs Jones set up a little tearoom by the sea at Aberystwyth, and being a thrifty lady, she decided the route to success was to cut costs. She would routinely collect the teapots from the tables after the customer had finished, dry out the tea and reuse it.

At first she did a roaring trade, her Welshcakes and bara brith were famous and tourists and locals would come to her tearoom on a regular basis. The business was a success and the tearoom always full. After a while, people began to comment to each other that while the baking was excellent, the tea was weak and did not refresh. Trade began to dry up until she had no choice but to close her little enterprise.

After chapel one Sunday Mrs Williams, the minister’s wife, stopped her as she was leaving and said “Oh dear, Mrs Jones, I see you lost your little tearoom.”

“I did.” Replied Mrs Jones with a sigh. “It wasn’t profitable in the long run.”

“There we are then,” declared the minister’s wife. “It only goes to show, honest tea is the best policy”.

Comment by gaabi on August 21, 2008 at 6:53pm

The film industry in Wales is really taking off and several remakes of classic films are in the pipeline to come out of Cardiff, re-done by Welsh directors, with a Welsh flavor, showcasing Welsh talent and Welsh technicians. Set for release over a two-year period are:

* 9 1/2 Leeks

* Trefforest Gump

* Cwmando

* An American in Powys

* Dai Hard

* The Wizard of Oswestry

* Cool Hand Look-you

* Sheepless in Seattle

* The Eagle has Llandudno

* The Magnificent Severn

* Haverfordwest Was Won

* Austin Powys

* The Magic Rhonddabout

* Independence Dai

* The Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch That Time Forgot

Comment by dave martin on August 20, 2008 at 6:32pm

how can you tell if a great grand mother is from splott she,s got adam ant casettes in her car

Comment by dave martin on August 20, 2008 at 6:23pm

the caerphilly virgins had their weekly meeting in a phone box it was crowded but you could still make a call

Comment by dave martin on August 20, 2008 at 6:21pm

i just got a message that this site has a issue , hope it aint a night issue

Comment by dave martin on August 20, 2008 at 6:10pm

a welsh squaddie kicks open a irish pub door during the recent troubles full camo and face paint , slaps his weapon down on the bar and orders a pint of stout empty in two swallows does six glasses of porter like this then asks the barman what you got to eat the barman tells him meat pies , he orders one and peels off the crust leans over and rips a micks ear right off his head inserts it into the pie and eats it and leaves , this goes on all week , well come friday the taff squaddie comes in and does nine pints ( its the start oif the week end init) orders the meat pie and does the same thing , so serving him the tenth pint the barman said "fooking ell taff your a hard man ", what regiment are you from , to which the taff replies "the pioneer corps "

Comment by Dom Stocqueler on August 10, 2008 at 4:32am

Can you hold these three sheep while I count them?

Comment by Ian Price on July 28, 2008 at 11:27pm

A man walks into a bar near Machynlleth and asks for a pint. Soon, twenty other customers walk in and each and every one of them say " A pint for me and a pint for Dai in the corner ". Our man looks to the corner and sees a little chap with the ugliest face on the planet. He's intrigued and asks the landlord what's the story.

The landlord tells him that on the previous New Years Eve, Dai in the corner was a strapping 6ft 8ins miner. At about ten to twelve that night the ceiling started to collapse but Dai stood up and held the ceiling in place until he was reduced to his present size.

!Oh! I see! but why is he so ugly?"


"That's where we wedged him in with a sledge hammer"

Comment by Ian Price on July 28, 2008 at 11:13pm

Welsh nick names:

A man here opened a bakery and naturally became known as Dai the bread. As the success of his business increased he bought a flash car and became known as Dai the Rolls. His social status increased to the point where he was given a peerage. He was thus known as Dai Upper Crust.

Comment by Dafydd Crwynwr on July 9, 2008 at 2:15pm

A man is hiking through the Welsh countryside and begins getting thirsty. He looks in his canteen and sees that it is empty. As he is walking he spies a small pond and walks down the hill toward it. As he kneels down cupping his hand to scoop up a mouthfull of water he hears a shout.

Up on the hill a man is waving his hands and shouts down to him, "Paid dy chi yn yfed y dwr! Mae'r gwartheg cachu yn y dwr!" (Don't drink the water the cows sh** in the water).

The man shouts back, " I don't understand you. I'm English. Speak English."

Then the man on the hill replies, "I said, use both hands, you'll get in more water!"

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